Telefriending for one year

In January, I will have been speaking to my telefriending partner for a year. I was very surprised when I heard that, as it barely seemed like last month that I was signing up. Before I started, I wasn't sure what to expect. I was worried whether I would be able to hold a conversation that was what the person I was calling wanted. This turned out to be an unfounded worry, as the person I call is very bubbly and was happy to talk, and we quickly found out that we have a lot in common. Both of us like drawing and painting, and we often talk about that. 

There have inevitably been challenges. My telefriending partner had a difficult time during lockdown, and sometimes listening without trying to give advice or fix things could initially be hard. On a purely personal level, I had a bad flare-up of OCD during lockdown that made certain aspects of telefriending difficult, but found that doing it every week in spite of that felt like an achievement. I also found it slightly daunting knowing what to say when my telefriending partner was going through difficult times. However, I think that saying these things was often what my telefriending partner wanted, and just showing that I was listening and giving them the space to say things that they could not say elsewhere was often what they needed. 

I find that I mostly ask questions when we are talking - sometimes the person that I talk to is surprised and pleased that I am interested, which I genuinely am. It is very rewarding to be able to give this space for someone to talk, as is hearing the experiences of an older LGBT+ person.